Reflections on the betrayal and crucifixion of Jesus Christ

We were celebrating our Passover Meal, and my King had slowed his eating and was preparing to speak. I was a little annoyed at the others because they were talking over each other and not taking notice of my Lord’s actions. I cleared my throat.

I wish I had not done this, for what my Lord said caused me a sickness to my stomach, and prevented me from finishing my meal.

Jesus looked solemnly at each of us around that table. Silence permeated the air and you could feel the hairs on the back of your neck standing straight up. Then He spoke. “Verily, I say unto you, that one of you shall betray me.”

Out of the blue He said this, without any warning. Well, I guess he had said some strange things last week, about being betrayed to be crucified two days after the feast of the Passover. He has been under so much stress lately, and his mind would wander into the morbid. I tried to tell him that if God in Heaven had chosen to save His people from His wrath during the Passover, that surely He would protect His well loved Son from danger. He smiled at me and we continued our walk. I was proud that I had comforted Him when He was weakened by his stresses.

But something in His manner was alarmingly different when he spoke at the feast. He had this intensity in his eyes that burned through each of us. I wanted to cry. “Lord, will it be I that betrays you?”, I cried out in torment! “I love you.” “Surely it’s not me!” He looked at me in silence. John turn to his beloved Master and could not restrain himself. He fell to his knees and pleaded with Jesus to remove this burden from him. Jesus turned to John and gently stroked his head, all the while looking at John with that deafening silence. One by one, each of His disciples cried with horror of being the one with the weakness of spirit to betray our King. He met each outcry with his silence.

Then He spoke. “The Son of man goeth as it is written of him: but woe unto that man by whom the Son of man is betrayed! It had been good for that man if he had not been born.”

Judas Iscariot looked at my Jesus and asked “Master, is it I?”

Jesus replied “Thou hast said.”

Then something really strange happened. Jesus said, “He it is, to whom I shall give a sop, when I have dipped it.” Then Jesus dipped the sop and gave it to Judas Iscariot, the son of Simon.
Suddenly, Judas jumped up and ran out of the room with a bag of money. Because he had the bag, we thought that Jesus needed some things for the feast, or had directed Judas to give the money to the poor. It was all so confusing…first Jesus is talking about His betrayal, then he switches gears and sends Judas away with the money. Sometimes I feel so stupid when my Teacher speaks His riddles. I just didn’t understand.

Okay, I’ll be truthful with you if you promise not to ridicule me. I told John about my feelings after these terrible events were past, and he laughed as me and told me I was just trying to be a big shot and act like the Lord’s life was in my hands. As I recalled the moment that Jesus handed Judas the sop, I remember what I felt. At that very moment, a coldness that chilled me clear to my bones rushed through the room. I can still see the slow motion replay of Jesus with tears in his eyes, handing that sop to Judas. Judas took it from him with a cold, evil and hardened stare. At that moment, I wanted to kill him. I remember trying to stand, to jump him, to rip him apart, but unseen forces stopped me. Then just as suddenly, my mind was filled with confusion, and I didn’t know what was going on. Thank God for my confusion!

Then Jesus turned to me and told me that I would deny Him three times as the rooster crowed. I was aghast that my Master would question my devotion and love for him. “No way!” I shouted. “I would never deny my Teacher and Lord Jesus Christ, the One I love most!” “I love you, Jesus!” I shouted with horror that He would think I could betray him in such a way.

Jesus ignored my cries of protest, stood up and prepared to leave the table. We all silently followed Him as he led us to a place called Gethsemane and instructed us to sit down while He went to pray in the garden. He asked me, John and James to accompany Him to the garden to give Him strength.
The garden was darkened by the shadows of the olive trees that outlined it’s path. It was late at night, and the night sounds echoed through the mini forest. Jesus was so quiet and I glanced at Him to make sure He was okay. He was crying. I reached to Him to offer my support. He began to sob quite heavily and momentarily collapsed against me, and I quickly pushed my body next to His to keep Him from falling. He was so heavy with burden. He pleaded with me not to leave Him alone while He prayed, for He was so sorrowful, he was fearful He might die from his sadness. He asked me to watch over Him while He prayed.

He went a little further up the path, and fell on His face, and fervently prayed “O my Father, if it be possible let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will but as thou wilt”.

I am ashamed to report that I do not know what else He prayed to our Father in Heaven. I fell asleep while He was praying, and was suddenly awakened by His anger. He was looking straight through me with such a piercing look, and behind the eyes of my Master I saw the pain I had caused Him by falling asleep.

“What, could you not watch me one hour?” He asked.

I was heartsick. “Yes, my dear Lord, you can count on me from now on to be there for you.” “My eyes grew weary from the lateness of night.” “Please don’t take my sleepiness as a lack of love for you,” I whispered to him in shaky voice. “I will be awake and next to you as you pray.”

The Master returned to His prayers. The next thing I know, Jesus is awakening us again, and told us that the “hour was at hand, and the Son of man is betrayed into the hands of sinners.” “Oh my God, I was found asleep again!” I was heart broken that I had let my Jesus down one more time.

Quite frankly, it angered me so much in my insides. I knew with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my being that I was devoted and in love with my Lord Jesus Christ. Surely an evil force must have closed my eyes. I was ready and looking to fight the next wicked force that was placed in my path.
I didn’t have long to wait. While Jesus spoke to us, Judas came up with a great multitude of soldiers, priests and elders. In the most sickening display of fake affection, Judas Iscariot came up to my Jesus and kissed Him.

Suddenly, the soldiers reached out and grabbed my Master and shoved Him to the ground. Dust was flying everywhere. I grabbed my sword and I struck out at him that was defiling my Jesus. I cut off his ear with one swipe. Then Jesus shouted at me to put up my sword and reminded me that if He wished He could pray to His Father, and God would send twelve legions of angels in His defense. He said, “All of this was done, that the scriptures of the prophets might be fulfilled.”

I was scared. If they seize my Master, and God allows this, then the soldiers would most certainly come after me. I ran away, with the other disciples running away right next to me. We forsook our King.

After reaching a safe distance, feelings of guilt overcame me. I had to follow my Jesus to see the end. I pretended to be one of the servants of the High Priest and entered their domain, where my Teacher was being held.

It was so crowded with people. The priests were speaking to the audience and begging anyone to come forward and speak up against Jesus, so that they might put Him to death. Several people came forward and made up lies about Jesus, but they were such ridiculous lies their false words could not be believed. Then this fellow came up and said he had heard Jesus say “I am able to destroy the temple of God, and to build it in three days.” Jesus held his peace. The High Priest asked Jesus if He was indeed the Son of God.

Jesus said to him, “Thou has said: nevertheless I say unto you, Hereafter shall you see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power and coming in the clouds of Heaven.”

The High Priest screamed his frustrations over the crowd, and grabbed his clothing and started ripping it to shreds. He accused Jesus of speaking blasphemy, and said there was no need for further witnesses. He asked the crowd what should be done. Suddenly, the crowd began to pick up on the word, and began chanting “death, death, death,” until the plea for my Jesus’ death rose to a fervent pitch. The crowd got out of control and lunged for my Master. They spit on Him and pushed Him through the crowd, and people began slapping Him with the palms of their hands. They started ridiculing Him, and asked Him to prophesy which would be the next to slap Him, then the next persecutor would take careful aim and let go with a loud, crackling slap. They dragged Jesus from the building. My knees were too weak, and I sat where I was.

Without the crowd to hide me, I was quickly noticed. Three times maids came and accused me of being a follower of Jesus. Three times I denied it. I heard the rooster crow and remembered my Jesus’ words of prophesy. I wept.

The next day they dragged Jesus before Governor Pontius Pilate. Pilate asked Jesus if He was the King of the Jews, and Jesus said to him “Thou sayest.” That was the only words my King spoke, despite all the accusations that were hurled toward Him. Pilate became weary of the crowd, as once again the fevered pitch of hatred began to wave across the hall. When he saw he could not stop the crowd’s anger any longer, he washed his hands in water before the multitude, saying “I am innocent of the blood of this just person, see ye to it.”

Then answered all the people and they said, “His blood be on us and on our children.

Then the soldiers of the Governor took Jesus into the common hall and gathered him unto the people’s soldiers. They pushed my precious Lord to the ground and stripped off all his clothes and placed a scarlet robe over him. Several soldiers ran outside like stupid children and gathered up thorns and tied them together to make a crown, which they shoved upon Jesus’ head. They put a reed in his right hand, and they bowed on their knees and mocked him, saying “Hail, King of Jews.” Then the crowd became riled again, and spit upon Him. Somebody grabbed the reed from His hands and began striking Jesus with harsh blows that nearly knocked Him unconscious.

After they were finished mocking Him, they led Him away to be crucified.

As He was dragging His cross through the crowded streets, the blows from the reed, the beatings of his tormentors and accusers, and the heaviness and burden of the cross caused Jesus to fall to His knees in agony. A man in the midst of the crowd went to Jesus’ side and helped Him bear the weight of the cross. I was unable to come to my Master’s side for one very good reason: I was a coward and could not make my legs work.

When they got to the trash dump, the soldiers threw Jesus to the ground, lay him on the cross…

“33 ¶ And when they were come unto a place called Golgotha, that is to say, a place of a skull, 34 They gave him vinegar to drink mingled with gall: and when he had tasted [thereof], he would not drink. 35 And they crucified him, and parted his garments, casting lots: that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the prophet, They parted my garments among them, and upon my vesture did they cast lots. 36 And sitting down they watched him there; 37 And set up over his head his accusation written, THIS IS JESUS THE KING OF THE JEWS. 38 Then were there two thieves crucified with him, one on the right hand, and another on the left. 39 And they that passed by reviled him, wagging their heads, 40 And saying, Thou that destroyest the temple, and buildest [it] in three days, save thyself. If thou be the Son of God, come down from the cross. 41 Likewise also the chief priests mocking [him], with the scribes and elders, said, 42 He saved others; himself he cannot save. If he be the King of Israel, let him now come down from the cross, and we will believe him. 43 He trusted in God; let him deliver him now, if he will have him: for he said, I am the Son of God. 44 The thieves also, which were crucified with him, cast the same in his teeth. 45 Now from the sixth hour there was darkness over all the land unto the ninth hour. 46 And about the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? that is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? 47 Some of them that stood there, when they heard [that], said, This [man] calleth for Elias. 48 And straightway one of them ran, and took a spunge, and filled [it] with vinegar, and put [it] on a reed, and gave him to drink. 49 The rest said, Let be, let us see whether Elias will come to save him.”

“50 ¶ Jesus, when he had cried again with a loud voice, yielded up the ghost. 51 And, behold, the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent; 52 And the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints which slept arose, 53 And came out of the graves after his resurrection, and went into the holy city, and appeared unto many. 54 Now when the centurion, and they that were with him, watching Jesus, saw the earthquake, and those things that were done, they feared greatly, saying, Truly this was the Son of God. 55 And many women were there beholding afar off, which followed Jesus from Galilee, ministering unto him: 56 Among which was Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James and Joses, and the mother of Zebedee’s children.”

“57 ¶ When the even was come, there came a rich man of Arimathaea, named Joseph, who also himself was Jesus’ disciple: 58 He went to Pilate, and begged the body of Jesus. Then Pilate commanded the body to be delivered. 59 And when Joseph had taken the body, he wrapped it in a clean linen cloth, 60 And laid it in his own new tomb, which he had hewn out in the rock: and he rolled a great stone to the door of the sepulchre, and departed. 61 And there was Mary Magdalene, and the other Mary, sitting over against the sepulchre. 62 Now the next day, that followed the day of the preparation, the chief priests and Pharisees came together unto Pilate, 63 Saying, Sir, we remember that that deceiver said, while he was yet alive, After three days I will rise again. 64 Command therefore that the sepulchre be made sure until the third day, lest his disciples come by night, and steal him away, and say unto the people, He is risen from the dead: so the last error shall be worse than the first. 65 Pilate said unto them, Ye have a watch: go your way, make [it] as sure as ye can. 66 So they went, and made the sepulchre sure, sealing the stone, and setting a watch.” (Matthew 27:33-66 av)

For further study refer to our Becker Bible Study on The Crucifxion of Jesus Christ

David "Bucker" Becker